(8)take these memories that are haunting me

I remeber those days you used to hold on to me so tight and beg me never to leave you. And i remeber how we used to swear on our lives that we were forever.
But the truth is, even if i hadn't done what i did with brandon, we would not have lasted much longer anyways. We just argued too much, remeber what i said about the smiley face chart? 6 smiley faces out of 6 weeks. And i think that piece of paper stuck to my wall, just confirmed what we knew in our hearts all a long. We were never meant for do or die. and we did love each other andy bunney, i loved you with everything i was capeable of, but we just fell apart.
and i can't tell you that im not bitter about the break up, because i am. maybe if youd done it to my face, i could of forgiven you, but getting another girl to call me? that was just heartless.
and i cant tell you im happy for you and your new relationship, because im not. and its not because i miss you, its because i dont want you to be happy after everything you put me through. I cant even say that we will be friends in time because i just dont know. I gave you everything i had, and you broke my fucking heart in two, and because of you, i am never going to trust fully again, and yes i know in the future, maybe even now, i am going to fall for someone, but i dont want to give them any part of myself, because i cannot risk getting hurt again.
and you walked away so easily.. you didnt have a single scar, and you could forget everything, but me? i cant forget, no matter how hard i try. I remeber the park and ride races, i remeber november 9th, i remeber christmas and easter, and all the times in the cinema, and i remeber how you held me when i was crying. and i want to fucking forget it all.
but i promise you, you will probbaly never remeber half the things i will never forget.
and i want to move on now, because im over you, and i just wanted you to know that yes, i am angry and bitter, and pissed offf, but im not sad anymore.
you were a lovely person to me andy bunney, but your also human, and you hurt me too much.
so now i just want you to go.
please
just dont break me down anymore.
because i need to learn to be strong again, so that when the right person comes along i can love them with everything ive got.

xx